Today: Official wedding photos and advice for brides

While we’ve officially been married for two months (and seven days, NBD) and I’ve shared various iPhone pics… I now have, in my possession, our official wedding photos from the incredibly talented Katherine and Craig at Henry Photographers.  Brace yourself.  My sock bun is almost as big as my goofy smile.

More to come, including photos from our Mass at St. Cecilia.  But first, every bride-to-be’s favorite part of wedding planning… unsolicited advice!

My advice for brides:

  • People are going to ask you a lot of questions.  You will know the answers to some.  You will not have even considered the answers to others (there really are people in the Universe who care about table linens).  You will want to keep some secrets.  Develop a canned answer now, if you can.  “It’s a surprise!” worked quite well for me.  It creates intrigue, without being dismissive.  And it works for (nearly) everything.  What does your dress look like?  It’s a surprise.  What is your first dance song?  It’s a surprise.  (Considering we finalized this choice three days before the wedding, our indecisiveness was the real surprise.  To our DJ.) Who are your bridesmaids? It’s a surprise.  Am I invited? It’s a surprise.
  • Bring flats.  Sparkly ones, if you can manage.
  • Speaking of shoes, I wore a pair of black pumps.  I knew no one would see them (they were hidden under all that Vera), so for once in my life I had the sense to choose function over fashion.  I have worn those pumps a dozen times since the wedding.  The lesson: there are plenty of opportunities to be sensible rather than fanciful.  Would champagne sequined shoes with some sort of ruffle or feather adornment have been fabulous?  Yes.  Would anyone notice them, without me hoisting up my dress?  No.  That doesn’t mean you shouldn’t buy amazing shoes.  It just means that you don’t have to.  Regardless of what Pinterest tells you.
  • Secure a non-ugly, non-plastic hanger for your dress.  Unless you don’t mind the cheap-o version showing up in photographs, as seen above.  Whoops.
  • Don’t limit yourself to actual bridesmaids dresses.  I think I had a dream, nay, a vision!, about champagne sequins dresses.  I became obsessed by this idea.  I searched for months and months a few days, and found the perfect dress at Nordstrom.  It was reasonably priced and looked incredible… on my incredible looking bridesmaids.  I only wish I had ordered one for myself. (#crazybridestatement)
  • Make a list of things that meet the following criteria: If this doesn’t get done, I will not die.  If this doesn’t get done, the wedding will still go on.  If this doesn’t get done, I will likely be the only one who notices.  For me, Mass programs were on that list.  Not surprisingly, I didn’t get around to printing them.  And I didn’t die.  The wedding still went on.  Maybe a few people noticed, but I like to imagine they thought I was a devoted environmentalist and made a conscious decision to save my brother and sister trees of the rain forest.  Things that do not meet the criteria, just in case you need examples: getting your marriage license and getting to the church on time.  Commit to not having a meltdown if the things on this list do not get done.  Focus on the important things.  Like table linens.
  • Find a mantra, a happy place, or a patient friend (or a stiff drink?) for when things get a little frenzied.  They might.  They might not.  I’m lucky that we had very few bumps along the road (don’t ask me about our caterer), and planning our wedding was quite a bit of fun for me.  Anytime I felt myself turning ferocious, though, I tried (and sometimes succeeded) in reminding myself that people are operating from a very good place.  And with the best of intentions.  Ultimately, I get to spend the rest of my life with Nick, and that is all that matters.

Oh, and get a massage.  I knew I forgot something.

[…BUT WAIT! THERE’S MORE!: More official wedding photos and more advice for brides.]

Also On Tap for Today:

What’s your best (unsolicited) advice for brides-to-be?  

13 thoughts on “Today: Official wedding photos and advice for brides

  1. And don’t you wonder how you got all of that done? My advice is to think outside the box and make your wedding a representation of you. And for heaven’s sake, look like yourself that day. We chose a cannoli tree instead of a wedding cake mostly because it was much cheaper, but it worked so well because Erm is straight up Italian. And people are still talking about them 4 years later… nobody cared that we didn’t have cake!
    I also tried so hard to smush my hair into this updo that not only did it not fit into, it didn’t look like me. When I let my stylist do what she could with my hair… it looked like me, and it looked perfect. I think that hair I had my heart set on would have ultimately looked funny on me and it would have shown.
    Apologies for the longest comment, ever. I think I could write a whole post on this, myself.

  2. Thanks for the advice! I love your dress so much. And thanks so much for sharing the details of the fabulous bridesmaid dresses. I have also really liked the sequin idea and have been at a loss. can’t wait to see more photos.

  3. Fantastic post, and you seriously look INCREDIBLE. I’m nowhere near getting married, but I’m obsessed with weddings so I always love to hear (er, read) this sort of thing. And… well, my brother is getting married in May so I guess I can forward this onto his fiancee, hahaha.

    You seriously look amazing, and before I even read your anecdote about the bridesmaid dresses I was like THOSE ARE GENIUS BRIDESMAID DRESSES. True story.

  4. This is wonderful, and I’m not just saying that because of all the sparkles (but the sparkles help). I’m still 8 months away from my wedding, and I’m an obsessive list-maker, so it’s a nice reminder to see your advice about the “things that matter” list. It’s one I hadn’t considered creating, but it’s definitely one I (and every bride) should have.

  5. Love the pictures! Congrats again!
    And the sequins. Love the sequins! Very fun 🙂

    Looks like some good advice that I hope one day I get to take 🙂 It also applies to life in general: don’t worry about the stuff you don’t need to worry about, and always have someone around to help you get through tough stuff.

  6. To say your pictures, etc. are beautiful is an understatement!! Wow! Isn’t it just wonderful to look back at such a special day?! The rush of emotion, feelings, butterflies is truly wonderful and timeless. Thanks for sharing!

  7. I LOOVE the sparkly champagne dresses!! What a great idea! And you were a GORGEOUS bride! Stunning.

    When I was planning my wedding, I was stuck on a “mossy green” theme for a good 5-6 months. Until I realized just how expensive it would be to put mossy green things everywhere.

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