While we’ve officially been married for two months (and seven days, NBD) and I’ve shared various iPhone pics… I now have, in my possession, our official wedding photos from the incredibly talented Katherine and Craig at Henry Photographers. Brace yourself. My sock bun is almost as big as my goofy smile.
More to come, including photos from our Mass at St. Cecilia. But first, every bride-to-be’s favorite part of wedding planning… unsolicited advice!
My advice for brides:
- People are going to ask you a lot of questions. You will know the answers to some. You will not have even considered the answers to others (there really are people in the Universe who care about table linens). You will want to keep some secrets. Develop a canned answer now, if you can. ”It’s a surprise!” worked quite well for me. It creates intrigue, without being dismissive. And it works for (nearly) everything. What does your dress look like? It’s a surprise. What is your first dance song? It’s a surprise. (Considering we finalized this choice three days before the wedding, our indecisiveness was the real surprise. To our DJ.) Who are your bridesmaids? It’s a surprise. Am I invited? It’s a surprise.
- Bring flats. Sparkly ones, if you can manage.
- Speaking of shoes, I wore a pair of black pumps. I knew no one would see them (they were hidden under all that Vera), so for once in my life I had the sense to choose function over fashion. I have worn those pumps a dozen times since the wedding. The lesson: there are plenty of opportunities to be sensible rather than fanciful. Would champagne sequined shoes with some sort of ruffle or feather adornment have been fabulous? Yes. Would anyone notice them, without me hoisting up my dress? No. That doesn’t mean you shouldn’t buy amazing shoes. It just means that you don’t have to. Regardless of what Pinterest tells you.
- Secure a non-ugly, non-plastic hanger for your dress. Unless you don’t mind the cheap-o version showing up in photographs, as seen above. Whoops.
- Don’t limit yourself to actual bridesmaids dresses. I think I had a dream, nay, a vision!, about champagne sequins dresses. I became obsessed by this idea. I searched for
months and monthsa few days, and found the perfect dress at Nordstrom. It was reasonably priced and looked incredible… on my incredible looking bridesmaids. I only wish I had ordered one for myself. (#crazybridestatement)
- Make a list of things that meet the following criteria: If this doesn’t get done, I will not die. If this doesn’t get done, the wedding will still go on. If this doesn’t get done, I will likely be the only one who notices. For me, Mass programs were on that list. Not surprisingly, I didn’t get around to printing them. And I didn’t die. The wedding still went on. Maybe a few people noticed, but I like to imagine they thought I was a devoted environmentalist and made a conscious decision to save my brother and sister trees of the rain forest. Things that do not meet the criteria, just in case you need examples: getting your marriage license and getting to the church on time. Commit to not having a meltdown if the things on this list do not get done. Focus on the important things.
Like table linens.
- Find a mantra, a happy place, or a patient friend (or a stiff drink?) for when things get a little frenzied. They might. They might not. I’m lucky that we had very few bumps along the road (don’t ask me about our caterer), and planning our wedding was quite a bit of fun for me. Anytime I felt myself turning ferocious, though, I tried (and sometimes succeeded) in reminding myself that people are operating from a very good place. And with the best of intentions. Ultimately, I get to spend the rest of my life with Nick, and that is all that matters.
Oh, and get a massage. I knew I forgot something.
Also On Tap for Today:
- (Vegetarian) sushi night with Elizabeth
- 9 ways to sneak in nutrition
- Need a smile? Check out the top 10 cutest photos of 2012
What’s your best (unsolicited) advice for brides-to-be?