Today: The bad news sandwich.

[tweetmeme source=”elizabethev” only_single=false]We’re in the process of hiring at work, which also means we’re in the process of not hiring 99.99 (repeating) % of people who have or will apply.  Nobody likes getting bad news.  Okay, maybe that’s not entirely true.  People who love to complain are fed by bad news in the same way that I am fed by cheese doodles.  And videos of French bulldogs sledding.  Regardless, I hate giving bad news.

Unless you’re a complete donkey, in which case, I sort of secretly like tell you that this is not your day.  For example, the people who automatically assume I am a dude, because I am the boss.  I don’t know many men named Elizabeth, but if you are out there, hello.  Or that I am multiple dudes (i.e., the person who addressed his cover letter to “Dear gentlemen”).  Or the person who declared in an interview (to my face, which was born in 1982, along with the rest of my body) that “people born after 1984 are much better at computers.”  First of all, that sentence is akin to saying you’re good at toasters.  Or good at planes.  And secondly, compute this: you are not hired.

But then, there are the people–and this is the vast majority of people (my heart is only partially frozen.. it’s more like a cute little icicle on one tiny corner or valve or whatever)–who you truly want to see succeed.  The people who are earnest, and kind, and hard-working, and trying their best to navigate a tremendously difficult job market.  The people that you want to advise, and help, and uplift, even though they are not the right fit for the position.

For these people, I try to serve up a bad news sandwich.  The bread is all positive and supportive in an effort to cushion the fact that I won’t be offering the recipient a job.  For example (ignore the fact that the cheese looks totally gross and sort of burnt at the edges, please):

Somewhere around the mushrooms or tomatoes, you say, “I’m terribly sorry, but I cannot offer you this job today.”  Your bread might say other things, like “I would like to pass along your resume to a colleague who might be hiring.”  Or, “You have so much to be proud of; I know someone will be very fortunate to have you their team.”  This is the key, though: whatever you say, you have to mean it.  Making things up isn’t helpful to anyone.

You can’t necessarily make this sandwich for everyone, all of the time.  But it is worth the effort when you can.  And it quickly washes away the bad taste being addressed as Mr. Human Resourcers (yes, that happened) leaves in my mouth.  If you’re out there looking for a job, hang in there.  Keep looking.  Something will happen, and when it does, I hope it’s really incredible.

In the meantime, want to win a real, actual sandwich or two? It’s Sandwich Day at Eversave and my pals would like to give one of you $5 in Save Rewards (for a Save of your choice) AND a Save for $10 worth of sandwiches and other treats at Pauli’s in the North End.  All you have to do is comment below.  Per yoosh, if you’d like an extra entry, feel free to tweet: I want to win free sandwiches from @EversaveBOS and @ElizabethEv! http://wp.me/pySBS-18y  A random winner will be announced on Saturday evening.

Also On Tap for Today:

  • Fighter conditioning at Peter Welch’s
  • Check out Eversave’s Sandwich Showdown
  • Be a good neighbor in the heat: check in on the elderly and others who may need help!

Congratulations, Annelise!  Please send me an email (ontapfortoday@gmail[dot]com) to claim your Save. 🙂

What’s your favorite way to stack a sandwich?  Any tips for being the bearer of bad news?

Comments (7)

  • allilearnslife

    July 22, 2011 at 9:47 am

    I work in HR too! the things that people do & say will never cease to amaze me.

  • Elizabeth Crew

    July 22, 2011 at 10:19 am

    As someone who is currently looking for a job, I really appreciate that you seem to be somehow responding to everyone who applies. I’ve gotten the “bad news sandwich” a few times, but nothing is more frustrating than applying, following up, and then never hearing anything, good or bad. Also, I totally got this eversave in my email this morning and am debating buying it because I love sandwiches and I love the North End. So it would be even more awesome if I didn’t even have to pay 😉

  • Annelise

    July 22, 2011 at 11:20 am

    I am about to start looking for a job and your bad news sandwich makes me feel oh so much better!

  • michellerunsnyc

    July 22, 2011 at 6:07 pm

    Ohhh I don’t envy you having to serve the bad new sandwich to people! But if they call you mister, they deserve it. 🙂 One time I pulled really hard for my company to hire this great, sincere, smart guy who really won me over when I interviewed him. They did and sat him in the cube next to mine. It turns out he has a chronic foot tapping issue as well as a chronic clearing his throat habit. There’s really no point to me adding that but it felt relevant in my head. 🙂

    (Also feel free to discount me from the drawing. I just wanted to comment. For someone who lives in Boston I rarely make it to the North End. I literally haven’t been there in years! And now I’m craving Italian!)

  • Bridget

    July 22, 2011 at 9:18 pm

    Omg I would love to hear all the stories about the kind of things people put on their resumes!! And yes I agree with one of the other commenters…bad news is almost better than NO news when it comes to job searching! I just went through it too, and would of loved a simple “no” instead of nothing.

    I love your sandwich.

    And I’m excited to see you tomorrow!! Will I be seeing Clark too??

  • Kelly

    July 23, 2011 at 10:33 am

    It’s nice of you to at least deliver the news at all- some places just never call! I laughed out loud at the gentlemen comment or the 1984 and computers comment. I was born in 1984, but I’m not better with computers than my husband who was born in 81- so random! I would say in GENERAL people from our generation 84 and 82 included are better than say, someone born in 61… but even that is just a generalization, I doubt you can really pick a specific year. People are so weird!

  • Shelby @ Lady Gouda

    July 26, 2011 at 8:14 pm

    We are hiring right now too, and there are so many people that I have interviewed over the past few days and I just want to be like- “no, no, this isn’t for you, but I have 6 more ideas of where you might re-focus your search…” But I can’t help them in that way, at least not yet. Glad that I’m not the only one….

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