Today: A laugh attack precipitated by a squirrel attack.

[tweetmeme source=”elizabethev” only_single=false]I had one too many Diet Cokes (yes, I am back on the wagon) last night and was having trouble falling asleep, so I spent a little time scrolling through my Twitter feed.  Adam at Universal Hub is always a great source for city news, often covering the real, meaningful stories that don’t make it to the front page.  Like, of the newspaper.  Remember those?  Every now and then something weird sneaks in there.

Yesterday he posted this, causing me to have an uncontrollable laughter-induced asthma attack.

Once I was able to breathe again, I clicked over to the original story and again, found myself needing medical attention.  Allow me to paraphrase for you:

A man sees what he assumes to be a dying squirrel.  He is incidentally a bartender, and unmarried  (the man, not the squirrel).  The man wants to give the squirrel a “dignified death,” so he tries to put it in a tree.  Then the squirrel bites him… and dies.  But don’t worry, animal control is following up.

Is this the strangest thing you have ever heard?  I’m too busy imagining how any of this happened, to get anything done.  At all.  It’s a miracle I am even able to type right now.  Also, if Nick comes home with a broken finger from a squirrel bite today… I just don’t know.  This is the kind of thing my uncle Dick would have just loved.

Also On Tap for Today:

• I went to Maine, and bought you a few pressies
• My face just melted off
• Goodbye random beach chairs, hello new sofa