Today: A vegetarian’s nightmare.
Warning: This post is disgusting.
[tweetmeme source=”elizabethev” only_single=false]There are a few things I never imagined I’d do in my life. Like cook a lobster (and you know, kill it in a pot of boiling water). Or purchase a bag of lamb’s ears, duck feet, and pig skin rolls. On purpose. For my dog. Without vomiting.
The Pawsitive Dog hosted a “treat party” for clients looking to stock up on nutritious (and, allegedly, delicious) treats for their dogs. I am so glad we opted for the small bag, as we now have what is–in reality–a very large bag of animal parts hidden in our cabinet. We spent about twenty minutes picking from a selection of gullets, tracheas, bladders and feet– the sorts of things that don’t often make it to human dining tables, but are very much edible for animals.
I nearly fainted six times, and had to keep the exit in plain view, lest I need to make a quick escape. There was a time when I bought things for Clark thinking they were just cutely named.
Oh, wow. That really looks like a pig’s snout. How quaint!
Get a clue, lady. If it looks like a pig’s snout, is labeled “pig’s snout,” and is being sold in a pet store… it’s likely a pig’s snout. Once, one of the friendly people at B.Y.O.D. asked if Clark liked tripe. I replied, “Oh yes, he looooves fish.” It wasn’t until I got home and Googled tripe, that I understood why the woman looked at me like I had two heads. She gave him a giant hunk of dehydrated tripe (also known as the first three stomachs of a cow), right around the same time I smelled something so foul that I feared I might expire. I threw my money on the counter and darted out of the store like hell on wheels. Or whatever that expression is.
Clark happily chewed his tripe the whole way to the car, hopped in his crate and we were on our way. It took me about 12 seconds of being in the car, with the windows up to realize that the tripe was very much the source of that God forsaken smell. I reached through the crate, grabbed that slimy thing from Clark’s mouth and threw it out the window. While driving (at least I wasn’t texting). Please consider this my formal apology to anyone on E. Broadway on May 13th who may have been hit with a tripe. I am sorry.
After 29 years (welp, now you know how young and sprightly I am) of not eating meat, I really though the day I bought a cow’s tail would never come. But it did. Last Wednesday. Since then, I have pulled a duck’s toenail from Clark’s bed, cleaned up the aftermath of a lamb’s ear and paced the hallways of our condo building wondering if I might die. Or at the very least, be kicked off the Boston Vegetarian Society listserv. Seriously, my life has become a vegetarian’s nightmare. Oh, the things we will do for the people and puppies we love.
Also On Tap for Today:
- Game 5, people!
- Updating my long run playlist
- Amazing sloth picture alert
Comments (11)
Stephanie
June 10, 2011 at 12:32 pm
ewww i wish i had not been eating while reading this lol
yay! game 5!!! would love to hear the playlist!!!
if you are not busy, come out to the 5 miler in quincy tomorrow or I am trying yoga for runners in southie on sunday 🙂
Elizabeth
June 10, 2011 at 1:47 pm
Oof, sorry about that. Should have probably started with a disclaimer. So gross. Will send you an email– have been wanting to check out that class for ages. It’s right in my ‘hood!
Emily @ A Cambridge Story
June 10, 2011 at 2:01 pm
Ack! This is a meat-eaters nightmare too! Seriously, all those doggie treats are pretty gross. Even the seemingly innocent rawhides get stinky and mushy!
Michelle
June 10, 2011 at 4:03 pm
Oh gosh, and here I thought that guy in the unitard and white face was the worst part of your week!
I think I accidentally touched cat vomit when I was cleaning it up this morning, does that count?
Jessica @ Dairy Free Betty
June 11, 2011 at 1:19 am
Ewwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwh!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 🙂 The things we do for our pets hey?
Lance says hi! 😉
Bridget
June 12, 2011 at 11:14 am
Hahah yeah some of those dried “items” are so gross to think about!! Although we have a bag of Tripe Treats and bromley LOVE them! THey aren’t chew things, just treats so they get eaten fast but I have to not think about what they are.
foodsweatandbeers
June 12, 2011 at 11:40 am
I think, for the most part, I steered clear of touching gross things this week. But not too long ago, I had to remove several rotting vegetables from my work fridge… they were getting to be so rank I couldn’t take even going to that corner of the office!! whew.
Stephanie
June 12, 2011 at 8:57 pm
What sort of tunes do you have on your running playlist? I never know what sort of music to load…right now it’s a lot of Lady Gaga and Glee *hides in shame*.
Also, that sloth! EEEP SO CUTE!
Today: Just dance. «
June 13, 2011 at 11:02 am
[…] = 'http://wp.me/pySBS-15c'; tweetmeme_source = '”elizabethev”'; Since my last post was completely disgusting, I felt I owed you something cute and fuzzy. Like a picture I found of myself on Facebook, as a […]
michellerunsnyc
June 14, 2011 at 8:49 am
Oh yes.. I have done the same thing for my dog. I try to make my roommate feed her the really gross meaty ones though. 🙂
Skinny Fat Kid
June 15, 2011 at 11:44 am
Izzy eats all kinds of that stuff! Bully sticks (which are dried bull’s “you know what’s”) as well as antlers which I feel much safer about. I never wanted a boy dog because I didn’t want his parts all over my couch and carpets! Guess I got worse because I have half chewed bull parts everywhere!