Today: Make World Peace

In an effort to, well, make world peace will I commit to do and not do the following*:

Things I will do:

• Recycle
• and when I am at my parents’ house, Compost (let’s be serious, a bucket of rotting food in an apartment does not a peaceful home make)
• Smile and say things like hello to passersby
• Hold the door and elevator
• Let cars cut into traffic ahead of me, even if they do not wave thank you
• Turn my music down
• Read more poetry
• De-clutter my closet and my brain area
• Swerve when a human or bird or squirrel or feral cat darts in front of my car
• Be really, really nice as often as possible
• Just, just, just, just dance

Things I will not do:

• Donate a bunch of stuff to justify buying a bunch of stuff
• Practice amateur karate moves with people or lamps around
• Make an annoyed face when people try to hug me
• Accept people’s Facebook requests just to laugh at their status updates
• Instinctively press the door close button in the elevator
• Take the elevator (unless I am carrying a lot of things)
• Pull up to the car in front of me to ensure that bicyclist pretending to be a motorist can’t pass through
• Judge the high happy people working at Trader Joe’s
• Use the car horn liberally and needlessly
• Hit (and run) a chipmunk
• Attribute Mother Teresa quotes to myself
• Follow Mr. G’s acting lessons literally and slap a butcher (see below)

[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uXjkUO88rcA&hl=en&fs=1&rel=0&color1=0x006699&color2=0x54abd6&border=1]

*I don’t pinky swear, but I will make a concerted effort.

Also On Tap for Today:

• Say to an inquisitive reporter, “My foot’s great. Now get out of here.”
• Update old posts with new beers
• Show some Massachusetts pride
• Unfurl a giant banner

How are you peacing it? Do you think peace is flowing like a river or a leaky faucet?